Angel in the Alleyway
by albert efron
Summary: HIATUS-AU. A "re-imagination" of the musical with old and new "musical numbers", i.e., singing through text lol. Title credit to David Archuleta : ErnstHanschen. ErnstMelchior. WendlaMelchior.
1. Prelude

**A.N.** I'm going to incorporate songs from and not from the musical to give this story a more musical-esque feel to it(: I'll list songs that will be in the chapter here in the author's note so you can look them up and listen to them. YouTube is the best source for anything, so my links are from YouTube, sooooo, just add the last bit to it. I'll include links too, but only for non-Spring Awakening songs cause I'm sure we all have or know the Spring Awakening songs lol. ENJOY! **P.S.** I may alter lyrics and stuff to fit the story better so, yeah(:

Paparazzi- Ernst ( Slow version sung by VogueDivad .com/watch?v=30TFYLttB_0 )

S P R I N G**AWAKENING**

Prelude to a Kiss:

"Ernst, you're such a sweetheart," Melchior chuckled.

Ernst blushed profusely and combed over his hair with his sweaty palms. Melchior stopped and gave Ernst a look. He smirked and slowly edged towards the meek boy to his left and nudged him with his shoulder.

"I wish I could keep an image of this moment forever," Melchior mumbled, more to himself than to Ernst.

"Are you okay, Ernst? You seem a little…distracted."

"Uh huh," Ernst nodded his head up and down nervously while wiping his hands on his thighs. The two boys were currently seated at the peak of a hill overlooking the countryside, basking in the morning sun.

Melchior raised a brow and chuckled once more, "I'll go fetch us some grapes. Green is your favorite right?"

Ernst nodded again and kept his focus on the quiet town below him. He rested his chin on one of his knees and wrapped his arms around shins sighing deeply. He looked over the boy briskly grabbing at random bunches of grapes from the vines.

* * *

Ernst:

We are the crowd/we're coming out/

got my flash on, it's true/need that picture of you/

it's so magical/we'd be so fantastical/cause you know that baby I/

I'm your biggest fan, I'll follow you until you love me/

papa-paparazzi/baby there's no other superstar,

you know that I'll be your papa-paparazzi/

Promise I'll be kind/but I won't stop until that boy is mine/

baby, you'll be famous, chase you down until you love me/papa-paparazzi/

* * *

"Isn't the day so magnificent, Ernst?" Melchior made his back over to the fragile boy on the ground, "Here you go, I made sure each grape was as beautiful as the other." He handed them over to which Ernst gladly accepted.

"You know, you've been awfully quiet since we've been up here. I mean, I know you're a quiet person in general, but seriously, is something the matter—damnit, I sat on one." He laughed dorkishly and jumped to his feet to wipe down his pants. Ernst giggled and drooled a little on his chin.

"Haha, you look like a baby eating for the first time," He leaned down and languidly wiped the juice from Ernst's chin. Melchior sat back down and popped a grape into his mouth and leaned back onto his elbows.

Ernst smiled warmly and looked him over.

* * *

Ernst:

I'll be your girl/backstage at your show/

velvet ropes and guitar/yeah, cause you're my rockstar/

it's so magical/we'd be so fantastical/cause you know that baby I/

I'm your biggest fan, I'll follow you until you love me/

papa-paparazzi/baby there's no other superstar,

you know that I'll be your papa-paparazzi/

Promise I'll be kind/but I won't stop until that boy is mine/

baby, you'll be famous, chase you down until you love me/papa-paparazzi//

* * *

"Ernst, if you're going to stare at me all day, the least you could do is say something."

"Oh!" Ernst was obviously caught off guard and looked away to hide his burning cheeks.

"It's okay, I like staring at people who arouse my interest as well," he edged closer until his lips were an inch away from Ernst's ear, "you're such a sweetheart."


	2. Chapter 1

**A.N. **Time for some Hanschen(: …… And Wendla. I guess. Lol, I like her honest.

Falling Slowly- Hanschen and Wendla ( Kris Allen's version, with some random harmonizer .com/watch?v=b0LISmz8WVc )

S P R I N G**AWAKENING**

Chapter 1

The familiar snicker broke Ernst from his state of daydreaming and he looked up to see the smiling face of Georg Zirschnitz, "Dreaming again, Robel?"

"Hello, Georg. How was your weekend?"

"Eh, boring as usual. I had to rake the leaves on our yard. How about you?"

Ernst shrugged his shoulders and shook his head, "Nothing special. Went to Mass and then went home."

Georg patted Ernst on the shoulder and retreated to his desk across the room. Ernst leaned on the palm of his hand and faced the window. He inhaled, and then exhaled. His favorite memories of Melchior are the ones he fabricated in his mind, especially during school days when he gets to see him in person. Although he felt guilty for thinking of him in such a sinful way, Ernst could not get over the fact that he admired Melchior like some famous musician.

Melchior was just tops; the bee's knees. He was handsome, athletic, not to mention intelligent, charismatic, and incredibly charming. And he always spoke up for what he believed in. One of the reasons why Ernst did poorly in class was because he was too busy fixated on Melchior. He hated it. As hard as he tried, he always got lost at some point during the day glancing at him.

"Oops!"

In the process of drooling over Melchior, Ernst had knocked over his piece of chalk and it rolled all the way to the back of the class. He got up and looked down at his feet searching for his chalk. He stopped suddenly and found it at the foot of another student. He recognized the shoe. This student always had his shoes so polished. The owner of the spotless footwear cleared his throat causing Ernst to shyly look up.

"It appears your chalk has grazed my shoe."

"I'm so sorry, Hanschen. It won't happen again."

"I didn't expect an apology."

"Sorry…"

"…"

"…"

Hanschen bent down to pick up the chalk and cupped one of Ernst's hands in his own, dropping the chalk into his palm. His hand lingered on top of Hanschen's longer than he had anticipated. Ernst figured, since Hanschen was the one to grab his hand, he would also be the one to remove it. And he hoped he'd do it soon because Ernst's cheeks could not get any hotter.

"Are you suffering a fever?" Hanschen placed his free hand over Ernst's forehead causing the timid boy to twitch slightly at the touch.

"No, I'm fine. Thank you."

Ernst hurriedly removed his hand and walked to his seat almost tripping over and empty desk.

"Otto?"

"Yeah, Hanschen?"

"Who was that?"

"What do you mean? That's Ernst Robel."

"Is he new?"

"No… Hanschen, he's been in our class all year, in fact, he's lived in this neighborhood all his life."

"I've never noticed him before."

"Maybe because you've never taken liberty to introduce yourself. In any case, he's always quiet in class. Except when we read passages from the Bible. He always jumps at the chance."

"He's rather interesting."

"What do you mean?

"Nothing that concerns you. I think we should sit down, Herr Sonnebitch is gonna be here soon."

"Hanschen!"

"You were thinking it, too."

As Ernst sat back down, Melchior Gabor followed suit and propped his elbows onto the top of Ernst's desk. "Hello, Ernst."

"H-hi, I mean, hello, Melchi—Melchior!"

Melchior chuckled, "Melchi is just fine. Actually, Moritz loves calling me that."

Ernst laughed awkwardly and scratched the side of his head. "So, what have you been up to lately?"

"Nothing much."

Ernst nodded and chewed on his lower lip. He was in incredible shock and awe that the Melchior Gabor had come over to talk to him, let alone lean on HIS desk. The two were met with silence which Ernst tried to break by clearing his throat. Actually, he attempted to clear his throat. He had actually made an "Mmm" sound and cracking his voice. Not his best icebreaker.

"Cute," was all Melchior said before leaning closer to the frail boy's ear, "Stay cautious of Hanschen. Please? He's a…different kind of person."

He cocked his head to one side and arched an eyebrow, "Different?"

"Well, his personality is kind of…unsettling. At times. Just, trust me on this okay?"

The rest of the boys all settled into their desks as Herr Sonnenstich arrived. They sat up promptly and greeted him in unison. He replied nonchalantly and immediately started to jot things down on the blackboard while murmuring a few things. Hanschen however, paid no attention to their teacher and focused all his concentration to the boy stealing glances at the window.

S P R I N G**AWAKENING**

"Oh, isn't this exciting! A free day from school! How wonderful it is Frau Mueller became suddenly ill!"

"Thea, what a horrible thing to say!" Anna interjected. The two girls, accompanied by Wendla and Martha were skipping down the sidewalk leaving their schoolhouse behind.

"What? You know it's true! You're just as happy as I am!" Thea twirled around dropping her books in the process.

"Thea, your books will get ruined," Wendla said picking up her friend's belongings.

"Oh, just let them! They're old anyway."

"If Papa saw my books in even the slightest bit of damage, he would ring me dry." Martha shuddered at the thought provoking Anna to rest her hand on her arm, "It's alright; my books are perfectly clean."

Anna smiled sweetly and let go of her arm, "We should all head over to my house for tea time."

"Tea, how boring! We should scope around the boy's schoolhouse! They're stuck learning while we get to be out in the open—we should try getting their attention from the gates!" Thea squealed at the thought and grabbed her books from Wendla.

"But won't that get them into trouble!" Secretly, Wendla wanted to go along with idea, she wished to see Melchior as much as possible. Ever since h stopped attending Mass three months ago, she's been deprived of his image.

"So? It's not us being whacked by the switch."

"Thea!" Martha and Anna exclaimed at the same time.

S P R I N G**AWAKENING**

"Herr Gabor! I will not warn you again!" With that said Herr Sonnenstich whacked Melchior's shin. The loud noise it made resonated throughout the room causing Ernst to heave as his heart raced faster. Hanschen took notice and wanted nothing more than to grasp him by the shoulder.

* * *

Hanschen:

I don't know you/

But I want you all the more for that/

* * *

"Oh dear! Melchi Gabor is being punished! How gallant!" Thea exclaimed, "such a radical!"

"Thea, control yourself." Anna scolded. The girls stood outside the school gates looking into the window where Ernst Robel sat. Wendla pawed at the twisted wires and frowned as she watched Melchior's frightful scenario unfold.

* * *

Hanschen and Wendla:

And words fall through me/

and always fool me/and I can't react/

Hanschen:

And games that never amount/

to more than they're meant/will play themselves out/

Hanschen and Wendla:

Take this sinking boat/and point it home/

we've still got time/raise you're hopeful voice/

you have a choice/you've made it now/

Falling slowly/eyes that know me/and I can't go back/

moods that take me/and erase me/and I'll fade back/

Wendla:

Well you have suffered enough/

and warred with yourself/it's time that you won/Oh-oh

Hanschen and Wendla:

Take this sinking boat/and point it home/

we've still got time/raise you're hopeful voice/

you have a choice/you've made it now/

Falling slowly/sing your melody/I'll sing along//

* * *

"Now. Sit down, Herr Gabor."

The switch was placed back on top of Herr Sonnenstich's desk. The last bell rang and the boys stood up in an instant. They filed into a single line and stacked their blackboards one on top of the other. Ernst's first instinct was to rush over to Melchior's side and ask if he was okay, but Hanschen had other plans.

Hanschen calmly walked in front of Ernst's path and placed a firm grasp on his shoulder, "I'll accompany you home…?"

"…Ernst?"

"Right, Ernst."

"_Stay cautious of Hanschen. He's a…different kind of person."_

Hanschen rolled his eyes, "Ernst?"

The boy immediately snapped out of his thoughts. "You will?"

"I just said so, didn't I? Or perhaps I was talking in my head."

"Oh no, I heard you. I was just…I was just wonder—I mean, making sure—I mean—" Unfortunately, this was 'the best excuse' Ernst could muster up in such short notice.

"Okay, okay. Don't kill yourself. Well, shall we? I can't be late for supper."


	3. Chapter 2

**A.N. **Hope you're all getting hooked(; Lol, and yeah, I was even iffy with putting Paparazzi myself, but the words seem to best describe Ernst's feelings for Melchior...in my story(:

The Word of Your Body- Hanschen only

S P R I N G**AWAKENING**

Chapter 2

"Hanschen, I don't normally take this route to my house."

Ernst was becoming worried. He had idly followed Hanschen from the schoolyard to where they now appear to be; the woods.

"Ernst, have I ever once been to your home?" Asked Hanschen leading the way. He held his books to one side of his body as his free hand whacked away at loose branches and troublesome gnats.

Ernst took a second to think, "No."

"And did I ask for directions to your home?"

Ernst thought again. He hadn't. "No."

"Then obviously we are not going to your home."

"Hanschen?!"

"Don't worry. I will take you home. Just not so soon."

The two boys finally made it to a clearing. Amidst the thick of trees was a perfectly secluded spot. In the middle of the tree-free, circular area was a tall stone, ideal for a pair of people to sit upon. Around it were purple flowers, with random dandelions mixed in.

"Hanschen, may I ask why we are here?"

He made no reply, nor did he intend to. At least, not right away. He wanted to drag this out as long as possible before swooping in for the kill. His prey? The ever meek, Ernst Robel.

"Sit." Hanschen ordered. He sat on the rock and patted the empty space beside him. "You may place your books on the ground, or simply hold them on your lap. Take your pick."

_He certainly is a demanding one, isn't he? Is this what Melchior was talking about?_ Ernst gulped and cautiously sat down next to him. His body tensed and twitched at the sudden graze of his elbow on Hanschen's arm. His quite muscular arm. Who knew beneath that thick patch of cotton laid a bulging bicep?

They sat there for what seemed like hours in total silence. Ernst was too nervous, and scared for his life to say anything. He was too busy trying to wipe away every trace of sweat that emitted from his body. After the eternity of nothing happening, Hanschen stood up.

"It's time."

Ernst became wide-eyed, "What?"

* * *

Hanschen:

Come cream away the bliss/

* * *

"Hanschen? What?"

* * *

Hanschen:

Travel the world within my lips/

* * *

"Hanschen…?"

* * *

Hanschen:

Fondle the pearls of a distant dream/

haven't you heard the word of your body?/

* * *

"…Hanchen…?"

* * *

Hanschen:

O, you're gonna be wounded/o, you're gonna be my wound/

o, you're gonna bruise, too/o, I'm gonna be your bruise//

* * *

Swiftly but softly, Hanschen leaned in for a kiss. He lightly touched Ernst's lips with his own before forcefully grabbing them into a lip lock. He continued kissing the other boy, fully aware of the unreciprocated action. After another ten seconds, he pulled away and gave a puzzled look to the boy sitting below him.

"What?"

Ernst remained wide-eyed and bushytailed. He could not comprehend what had just happened. Without a word he got up and ran through the trees, passed the bushes, and back out into civilization where everything made sense. The worst part of it all? Ernst had somewhat enjoyed that bizarre and frightening moment alone with Hanschen. But he couldn't! No, such act of impurity was greatly looked down upon by the Church. So was he doomed to live a life of eternal damnation for receiving enjoyment from a sin he didn't choose to commit? If it didn't, then what did it make him? Surely it couldn't be proper to think of something such as what happened as proper in eyes of God. One thing was for sure, everything else went away when he had his quality time with his Bible.


	4. Chapter 3

**A.N. **thank you very much for your reviews(: They're lovely! And I'm glad the songs fit(((:

My Junk-Company

S P R I N G**AWAKENING**

Chapter 3

Ernst came into school with a huge smile on his face. He was simply radiant. And everyone took notice of his sudden change in demeanor, especially Hanschen. In the back of the room sat Hanschen, back against the chair, arms folded over his chest, with a knowing smirk on his face. He knew he'd be able to wiggle his way into the timid Robel's life. He also had anticipated it would be fairly easy.

With his beaming new appearance, Ernst had not paid any attention to the awkward boy on the floor trying his best to tie his shoelaces. So, he tripped.

"Ernst?! I-I'm so sorry!" cried Moritz, completely embarrassed for causing his friend pain.

"No, Moritz, I'm sorry. I wasn't looking." Ernst smiled happily, for the first time. This had been the first time since he was 7 that Ernst had smiled naturally, and smiled wide, teeth showing. His last memory of smiling so widely was when he received two chocolate cakes for his 7th birthday when his parents, through miscommunication, ordered two separate cakes for him.

"E-Ernst? You seem quite happy today."

The two boys stood up together and Ernst nodded back, "I am. I'm not really sure why though."

In actuality, Ernst did know why, he just didn't know how to cover it up with a lie. It concerns one fateful afternoon with a certain boy in the same room.

Moritz walked Ernst over to Melchior's desk where he was preoccupied with reading. The book itself was one of many banned novels that he had found disposing of trash in the dumpster in the alley behind the town's market.

"Melchi, doesn't Ernst seem different to you today?"

He looked up from his book only to be awestruck. Ernst was smiling. The smile was so bright it had caused The Melchior Gabor to become flushed in the face. He immediately looked back down and buried his nose in his novel, "Why, yes, he does seem different. Did you cut your hair?" _What?_

Ernst gave a quizzical look, one only Moritz could see, "No."

"Oh, then you've changed the way you comb it?" Melchior recovered. _Stop it, stop this instant!_

"Melchi," Moritz started, "he didn't change ph-ph-physically."

"Oh, then I must be blind." Melchior wanted to mentally slap himself.

In truth, the self-proclaimed philosopher had always fancied Ernst. Ever since he found the book of Greek and Roman Mythology, he had become fascinated with the idea of a man being with another man. It certainly did arouse interest in him. Though, he's never told anyone, not even Moritz. Yes, he loved speaking his mind, but SOME things are best kept secret.

Ever since then, he's always thought of Ernst as the ideal boy to which he could experiment the whole 'homosexuality' thing with. He was docile, modest, and had a certain cuteness to his whole being. Melchior was certainly a softy for a softy. But this was just not his day. He was caught so off-guard by Ernst's newfound smile that his brain had no time to function properly.

Ernst on the other hand, was clearly disappointed, if not hurt by Melchior's seeming disinterest in him. For a split second his smile faded back into the lonely, grimace his face once bore, but it quickly rejuvenated.

"Well, I better sit down."

Ernst turned on his heel and sat down at his desk, masking the hurt he felt in his body.

S P R I N G**AWAKENING**

"Girls! You'll never believe what I saw on my way here this morning!" Thea exclaimed as she ran into the classroom. Frau Mueller had made a fast recovery and became annoyed with Thea's vivid outburst.

"What was it, Thea?" Wendla asked softly.

"Ernst Robel!"

Anna, Martha, and Wendla all looked to each other before unanimously asking, "What?"

Thea continued, "I know, I know, you've seen him to, but not like this!"

"How did he look like?" asked Anna, evidently intrigued.

"He looked…_appealing_!"

The three girls gasped as Thea covered her mouth. Without warning, Frau Mueller approached Thea's side, "What looked appealing?"

Thea looked up and smiled innocently, "Oh, my bed."

Frau Mueller dropped her jaw in shock, "Excuse me, young lady?!"

Thea shook her head vigorously, "I meant, it looked so comfortable when I tidied it up this morning, I just wanted to go back in and sleep some more!"

Frau Mueller, obviously buying into the lie, frowned, "Well, over-sleeping when one is not ill is not proper etiquette. Especially for a young woman still growing, who will later be married off to a man who will expect a diligent upkeep with household chores."

With that said, she walked away in a huff. The girls all sighed and looked to Thea, bothered by the fact that they were almost written up for a demerit because of her, again. Gossiping is one thing, but to speak of such 'sinful' thoughts, such as which boy was cuter, aloud in front of an adult is an outrage.

"Thea, please, control yourself." Anna tried her best to coax her.

Thea whimpered, "I'm sorry! I try, really! It's just, _oh_! You should have seen him, smiling so brightly! He lit up the street!"

* * *

Thea:

In the midst of this nothing, this miss of a life/

still there's this wanting just to see you go by/

* * *

"Well, boys do have a way of getting to us," Martha replied dreamily, "like the eyes of that sad, soulful, Moritz Steifel."

"Moritz Steifel?!" Thea shrieked.

"I will not warn you again, young lady!" Yelled Frau Mueller irritated.

* * *

Martha:

It's almost like lovin', sad as that is/

Wendla:

May not be cool, but it's so where I live/

* * *

"I don't know about Moritz Steifel, but certainly Melchior Gabor is one to swoon over." Anna replied.

* * *

Anna:

It's like I'm your lover, or more like your ghost/

I spend the day wond'ring what you do/where you go/

Thea:

I try and just kick it/but then what can I do?/

We've all got our junk, and my junk is you/

Girls:

See us winter walkin' after a storm/its chill in the wind/

Anna and Thea:

But it's warm in your arms/

Girls:

We stop all snow line/may not be true/

we've all got our junk, and my junk is you/

_

* * *

Melchior, Melchior. In all honesty, THIS is when you choose to become tongue-tied? Speak your mind for anything that will cause pain, and once the opportunity presents itself to cast praise at Ernst Robel, you fail. Fail miserably._ The boy could not get over his horrible incident. He wanted nothing more than to huddle in a corner by himself. He even preferred to be hit by Herr Sonnenstich's switch if it meant calming his nerves.

The smirk on Hanschen's face never faded. _Desdemona, you're going to have to take leave for tonight._

* * *

Melchior:

Well, you'll have to excuse me/sorry I was off/

your beauty shot through me, your smile was enough/

Hanschen:

I'll go up to my room, turn my stereo on/shoot up some you,

and the you is some song/

Wendla:

I lie back just driftin'/and play out these scenes/

I ride on the rush of all the hopes, all the dreams/

Anna:

I may be neglecting the things I should do/

but we've all got our junk, and my junk is you/

Girls & Boys:

See, we still keep talkin' after you're gone/

you still with me then/

Hanschen and Melchior:

Feels so good in my arms/

Girls & Boys:

They say you go blind/maybe its true/

we've all got our junk, and my junk is you/oh!/

It's like we stop time/what can I do?/We've all got our junk,

and my junk is you/my junk is you/you, you, you//

* * *

Then it dawned on him.

"_He's a…different kind of person."_

Could it be that Melchior was warning Ernst to steer clear of Hanschen because he knew of Hanschen's attraction to men? Could it be that Melchior was not into that sort of thing? Then it hit him again. God. Ernst had remembered the lecture about so-called 'homosexual' relations. They were wrong. Melchior was trying to protect Ernst from Hanschen's evil and corrupt way of thinking. At first, Ernst smiled at the thought. After thinking it over some more, it hurt. As immoral as it was, Ernst had liked it when Hanschen kissed him. In fact, Ernst wanted the same action from Melchior himself. But if what he thought was correct, then Melchior would condemn him, as would his family, and worse, the Church. As he contemplated the subject further within the confines of his mind, Ernst sunk lower and lower into his chair.


	5. Chapter 4

**A.N.** I really hope no one is offended by Martha's solo. This is an upbeat song and I tried my best to fit each verse with their character. I thought I creatively stitched in her issues within this song, I don't take it lightly but I thought it fit. I also tried to keep it vague, I hope I did it justice. I know it seemed like Ernst totally pushed away anything having to do with Hanschen, but for now it won't be explored, it will be soon, like, next chapter....kind of. Lol.

The Bitch of Living- Company

S P R I N G**AWAKENING**

Chapter 4

After saying their farewells, the four girls split apart to walk their separate ways home.

Wendla, as she typically did on her lonely walks home, decided to muse about Melchior. She admired the boy dearly. She wanted nothing more than to have him hold her in his arms as he once did when they were young. When he would assume the role of the brave and handsome pirate captain saving the poor damsel that was Wendla. Of course, back then, she was much too young to think of such lustful thoughts. Every day, she wishes for the same thing; to go back to the days of her childhood when she was allowed to spend so much time with Melchior Gabor. Nowadays, she only gets a rush from what she hears of him. Ever since the schoolhouses decided to separate the boys from the girls, it was like they were never even friends.

Bump. Drop.

"Sorry!"

The pair bent down only to slowly rise back up at the sight of the other. It was as if God had answered Wendla's prayers. Right before her stood Melchior Gabor. His smile was as charming and alluring as ever. Well, from what she's been told.

"Wendla! It's been ages, hasn't it?"

The young girl was so awestruck her mouth hung open until Melchi graced her beauty by shutting it closed with the tip of his finger. He left his finger on her chin far longer than he wanted and the moment heated in an instance. Wendla was so caught up in the moment she hadn't realized what she had done until she did it.

"Uh…?"

Melchior lightly touched the part of his cheek Wendla kissed. His cheeks were burning and he was speechless.

"I'm sorry; I don't know what came over me." Wendla looked down and retreated slightly looking down at her shoes. After no words were exchanged she looked back up only to see Melchior with a frown placed upon his face. The sun was setting behind his head and she knew he did not appreciate her sentiment. He placed a loving hand on her shoulder and sighed.

"I'm sorry Wendla, I must be going. Hope we run into each other again. Though, not so literally."

He smiled warmly and picked up her books, handing them over to her before walking passed her. She nodded her head faintly, knowing he was not looking at her anymore, and walked towards her own home, holding back tears.

S P R I N G**AWAKENING**

"Melchi—oops!"

Moritz ran into the room the following morning, papers in hand, when he tripped over his unkempt shoelaces.

"Sorry."

Moritz bent down and scavenged for his fallen pieces of paper. Melchior and Georg got up from their respective desks to help out.

Georg ran a hand through his hair as he looked over a piece with messy writing and doodles of what seemed like genitalia. "Moritz? What's this—"

"Uh—nothing! J-just some notes! Notes, for uh, biology!"

The fumbling boy took snatched the essay from Georg's hand and out of his prying eyes into the safety of his pocket. Melchior chuckled at the mention of his essay as he continued cleaning up Moritz's mess.

Georg snickered and handed his pile over to Melchior and went to talk with Otto. Melchior collected them all and neatly filed them into a pristine stack.

"Moritz, what are all these papers for anyway? I don't remember taking these many notes."

"That's what I wanted to talk to you about, Melchi," he started. He grabbed his papers and shoved them into his desk. He walked back around and began fumbling with the hem of his jacket. "I can't go over to your house for dinner tonight…or ever. At least! Not until I raise my grades. My father's been in a sour mood lately, and I'm afraid if I don't get more serious with my studies, it'll be the last time I see you anywhere."

Melchior shook his head, "Don't speak like that Moritz. You will raise your grades. Don't get yourself worked up over me, it's alright. Actually, I was going to ask if I could invite Ernst over for dinner tonight."

"R-really? Why?"

Melchior blushed slightly and closed his eyes and rubbed the back of his neck in hopes of calming down, "No particular reason, just wanted a change."

"Change?! Like, replacing me?!"

"No, Moritz," Melchior laughed, "I didn't mean like that."

As soon as Moritz sat down in his chair Ernst came strolling in.

"Hey Melchi, Ernst is here."

At the mention of his name, Ernst made his way over to Moritz's desk and smiled at him politely, "Yes, Moritz?"

Moritz shook his head while grinning ear to ear, "Oh not me, Melchior wanted to talk to you."

At the mention of _his_ name, Ernst blushed. "Oh, is that so?" After having Moritz nod his head eagerly, Ernst walked over to Melchior. "Um, hello, Melchior. Moritz said you wanted to talk to me?"

He smiled back at Ernst and placed his book down, making sure to cover it with his blackboard, "Yeah, I did actually. Are you free to come by my house tonight?"

The blush returned to Ernst's face. Would his parents allow him to? He wouldn't want to refuse.

"Um, I'd love to Melchior, but I'm afraid I must ask my parents first. I'm sorry."

Melchior grinned, "It's no problem, I understand. How about you ask them tonight if you can have dinner at my place tomorrow?"

By this time, a certain someone had picked up on the conversation and was listening intently.

Ernst nodded his head excitedly and answered, "I will do that," much to a certain someone's annoyance.

S P R I N G**AWAKENING**

A few blocks down at the girls' schoolhouse, the foursome were getting their ears a stern lecturing after having been caught passing notes. Frau Mueller did not take insubordination flippantly.

_At least we're not being smacked._ Thea thought grimly.

* * *

Thea:

God, I dreamed I was an angel/beautiful and tall/

but then, I cried out like, in Latin, "This is so not life at all"/

someone help me from this nightmare/just give a little call/

But, UGH, just give it time girl, this will work out if you stall/

Anna:

So then, give me your bad dreams/and that itch you can't control/

let me teach you how to handle all the sadness in your soul/oh! We'll

build some silver castles/close the doors and climb the walls/

stress can make you dead girl, remove it once and all/

Thea, Anna, Wendla:

It's a bitch of a living/

Martha:

Bitch, just a bitch/

Thea, Anna, Wendla:

Living with such stress/

Martha:

Just a bitch, yeah!/

Thea, Anna, Wendla, Martha:

Just a bitch of a living/

Especially in a dress/

Martha:

See, each night it's like "fantastic"/tossing, turning without rest/

I live my days inside a prison/no pillow for my head/

when my father's at an outrage/he grabs his leather belt/I've got

nothing but a breath/and I say, "time for hell"/

Wendla:

It's a bitch of a living/

Anna:

Bitch/

Anna and Thea:

Ah-ah-ah/

Wendla:

With nothing going on/

Anna and Thea:

Nothing going on/

Wendla:

Just a bitch of a living, asking/

Thea, Anna, Wendla, Martha:

"What went wrong?"/Do they think we want this?/

Oh who knows?/

_

* * *

(Segue to the boys' schoolhouse…)_

"Now, everyone, recite last night's passage from your Latin textbook on page 134 from memory. Ready? Begin…" Herr Sonnenstich began conducting them as if they were an orchestra.

* * *

Melchior:

It's a bitch of a living/

Boys:

It's a bitch of a living/

Melchior:

Living in your head/

Boys:

In your head/

Melchior & Boys:

Just a bitch/

Melchior:

…of a living, and sensing God is dead/

Boys:

It's a bitch of a living/

Tryin' to get ahead/

Melchior:

You watch me, just watch me/

I'm calling and one day/

Boys:

It's a bitch of a living/

Moritz:

Just gettin' out of bed/

Melchior:

All will know/

All will know/

And knowing this is it/

Boys:

It's the bitch of a living, living, living/

And getting what you get/

Just a bitch of a living

Boys:

God is this it?/This can't be it/

Oh God, what a bitch//

* * *

The boys stood up and Melchior walked over to Ernst, "See you tomorrow, don't forget to ask, okay?"


	6. Chapter 5

**A.N.** I loved re-imagining this scene(:

Touch Me- Company

S P R I N G**AWAKENING**

Chapter 5

"Were you given permission to come?"

It was safe to say that Melchior was a little more than anxious to know whether or not the Robel boy could go over to his house. Ernst smiled at the thought and gladly nodded his head. Melchior had to hold in his excitement and bit on his lower lip while smiling. He was at last going to have some quality time with Ernst Robel. As soon as Melchior began his walk back to his desk, Hanschen came strolling by and stopped at the head of Ernst's desk. The boy was too busy looking over his Bible that he didn't notice him until the hovering man cleared his throat.

"Oh, Hanschen! Hello."

Then it struck him. He had kissed this boy no more than three days ago.

"You don't have to blush around me Ernst. As cute as it may be, you have to learn to be more comfortable around me."

Ernst just nodded his head as Hanschen continued.

"I couldn't help overhearing you are to attend dinner at the Gabors' home. Is this information accurate?"

He nodded again.

"Hmm. Very well, do as you please."

Another nod. That was the only action Ernst was capable of performing after remembering his past encounter with Hanschen. He was embarrassed to say the least. Typically, a devout Catholic boy like him should feel ashamed, but he wasn't sure if he was. In fact, a little part of him was longing for it to happen again, but he was for sure not going to request for it. Just then Herr Sonnenstich waltzed on in.

"Settle down and take out your homework assignment from last night."

S P R I N G**AWAKENING**

The walk to Melchior's house was met with an unusual comfortable silence. The two exchanged glances occasionally and where Melchior smiled, Ernst looked down timidly causing Melchior's smile to widen each time. When they finally reached his doorstep, Melchior knocked three times and then proceeded to yell through the door telling his parents, "I'm home, with Ernst Robel!"

He stepped off their doormat to grab the hidden key beneath it and unlocked his front door. Being the gentleman that he was, he held the door open for Ernst to enter, "Don't be shy. We're not going to keep you here forever. Well, unless you want to stay here forever."

Ernst vigorously shook his head and entered after a second's hesitation. The house was certainly homely. It wasn't extravagant, but it was lacking. It seemed perfectly balanced. The furniture was kept clean with only a slight layer of dust on some of the tables and frames. Suddenly he smelt something so incredibly delightful.

"My mom made cookies. I remember you telling us one time that you loved chocolate chip cookies."

Ernst looked to Melchior and smiled happily. The boy was too busy taking off his shoes to notice though. Melchior finished untying his shoes and stood up, "You don't have to remove your shoes, me? I like feeling as comfortable as possible in my home." Ernst smiled at the thought.

"So you're Ernst! I've seen you all the time; you never miss a Sunday service, do you?" asked Frau Gabor as she entered her living room, towel in hand wiping away the mess she collected from cooking.

"No, Frau Gabor. It's the highlight of my week." He replied politely.

"Humph, if only Melchior had the same way of thinking." She said with a slight smile to which Melchior rolled his eyes. "Well, dinner is ready, Melchior will you go call your father down?"

"Yes, mother."

Melchior ran up his stairs as Frau Gabor led Ernst into the dining area. The table was already set and the food was a beautiful, steaming pile in the middle.

"Thank you so much for having me over, Frau Gabor. I hope I'm not a bother."

"I hope so, too." She laughed a little and took a seat in her usual spot at the table, "Your welcome, dear, and you are certainly no bother to us. I love meeting all of Melchior's friends."

Ernst sat down and waited for Melchior to return with his father. The dinner went smoothly. As expected, Ernst remained as quiet as possible. Melchior's father, although having a somewhat stern sounding voice, seemed unexpectedly pleasant and tried on many occasions to get the boy to hold a conversation for more than three seconds. Melchior's mother was smiling the whole dinner though and kept her comments brief yet delightful.

After dinner was over, Melchior stood up and grabbed both his and Ernst's dishes, "Melchior, I can help."

"Well, most certainly not, you're the guest."

Melchior proceeded to clean up after him and even took his parents' dishes.

"Well, I'm off to bed. Got a big day ahead of me tomorrow. Pleasure meeting you, Ernst." With that said, Herr Gabor stood up and placed his napkin on the table before retreating back upstairs.

"Mom, we're going to head to my bedroom."

"But what about the cookies I baked?"

Ernst's ears perked up at the mention of cookies.

"We'll eat them upstairs. Is that alright?"

"Well, fine. But don't spill; I don't want any insects crawling around the house."

S P R I N G**AWAKENING**

Meanwhile, Hanschen lay in his bed contemplating what Ernst and Melchior could be doing at this exact moment. His arms were behind his head and he tapped his foot at the edge of his bed. He took a deep breath and closed his eyes.

S P R I N G**AWAKENING**

"These cookies are delicious, Melchior!"

He smiled back at him and wiped the crumbs from his hands on his pants and looked up to see Ernst enjoying himself to another one.

"Ernst, can I ask you a serious question? Now, you don't have to answer if you don't want to."

"Sure, Melchi."

Ernst was too busy eating his cookies, he was half listening to what Melchior was saying.

"Is there anyone you're, well, attracted to?"

"No." Ernst replied half-conscious of what they were even talking about.

Melchior looked slightly disgruntled and continued on, "So I take it you've never kissed anyone then?" he said this as he thought back to Wendla's kiss on his cheek.

At the mention of kiss, Ernst started to choke on his cookie and covered his mouth. His face became red with every cough and Melchior immediately ran to his side and roughly patted his back.

"Drink some water."

Ernst did as he was told and the color on his face slowly returned to normal. Melchior sighed.

"A few days ago, Moritz asked me to write him an essay discussing issues about…now, don't be offended, but, well, about sex, and the male and female anatomy."

Ernst did not like where this conversation was going and nervously gulped down his glass of water choking again. Melchior remained at his side and rubbed his back causing the redness in Ernst's face to return, but for a whole different reason.

"He started asking me how men and women have sex, but before I could explain in more detail, he just abruptly left." Melchior laughed, "He even had me draw him pictures."

Ernst was feeling very uncomfortable now. The subject matter and the fact that Melchior was rubbing his back were not helping at all. But as soon as he started to relax into Melchior's touch, he went sit back down in his chair directly across from Ernst. The two were separated by a small table that held the tray plate of cookies.

"And it got me to thinking. You know, I've read books with accounts of men having sexual relations with other men."

This was becoming ridiculous for Ernst. This was becoming way too much for his fragile mind and body to handle.

"How would a man and…another man _do_ it? How would _that_ measure up?"

Ernst couldn't help himself; he needed to know, "Isn't it wrong to have…sexual relations between two men, or even two women?"

"And who is it that said that?"

"Well, God, the priests, our parents."

"I don't remember hearing God say those words."

"The priests taught us that he did."

"How can we trust the knowledge from those who oppress us from learning things for ourselves?"

"Because they're only trying to protect us."

Melchior was becoming heated, "Protecting and oppressing have very different meanings."

"Our lives are safe, because of what we are told to do and told not to do."

"Our lives are mundane because we aren't free to choose how we want to live our lives! Is that the kind of "protection" you want to have?"

"As long as I'm safe…"

"Ernst… Well, it's certainly not the kind of life I want."

* * *

Melchior:

Where I go/when I go there/no more memory anymore/

only men on distant ships, the women with them swimming with them to shore/

Where I go/when I go there/no more whispering anymore/

only hymns upon your lips/a mystic wisdom rising with them to shore/

* * *

"Haven't you ever longed for something you've been told was wrong? Is it wrong to yearn for something, to desire something that you know will bring you happiness?"

Ernst took in his questions and closed his eyes. Immediately his visions were filled with Melchior's face, his smile, his laugh, his warm, strong hands, roaming over his back, over his chest.

* * *

Ernst:

Touch me/just like that/and that oh, yeah/

now that's heaven/now that I like/God, that's so nice/

now lower down/where the figs lie/

* * *

His eyes shot open immediately, somehow his thoughts of Melchior changed into thoughts of Hanschen. His heart started beating faster and he picked up his glass to drink water only to discover it empty.

* * *

Company:

Oh-oh-oh, my God/

Oh-oh-oh yeah, yeah, yeah/ _(repeats)_

* * *

"Come on, Ernst, everyone has. People all around you, your friends, your family members, strangers you pass on the street."

Melchior stood up and walked behind Ernst's chair placing a hand on his shoulder.

"It's okay to tell me. I've undoubtedly had my own fair share of fantasies."

* * *

Company:

Touch me/ _(repeats)_

* * *

Ernst's face was burning, "I-I have to go!" with that he bolted from the room and down the stairs.

"Ernst, wait!"

* * *

Company:

Ah-ah-ah/ah-ah-ah/

* * *

Melchior ran to his front door right when it slammed shut. He pounded his fist against it and rested his forehead on the door. On the other side, Ernst leaned back against the cold wood trying to regulate his heart rate and his breathing.

* * *

Company:

Oh-oh/oh-oh/oh-oh-oh!/

Otto:

Where I go/when I go there/no more shadows anymore/

only men with golden fins/the rhythm with them, rocking with them to shore/

Moritz:

Where I go/when I go there/no more weeping, anymore/

only in and out your lips/the broken wishes washing with them to shore/

_(Ernst and Melchior remain in their same spots at the door as described previously)_

Ernst and Melchior (sung over girls' verses):

Touch me/all silent/tell me please, "All is forgiven"/

consume my wine/consume my mind/I'll tell you how, how the winds sigh/

Company:

Touch me/

Georg:

Oh-oh/just try it

Now, there that's it/oh, God, that's heaven/

Oh, I'll love you right/

We'll wander down where the sins cry/

Company:

Touch me/just like that/

Now lower down, where the sins lie/

Love me/just for a bit/

We'll wander down, where's the winds sigh, where the winds sigh/

where the winds sigh//

* * *

"Melchior? Has Ernst gone?" His mother asked, dish in hand as she wiped it down with a rag.

Melchior sighed and stood away from the door, "Yes, he has."

"Sweet boy."

"Yes, he is. He loved the cookies; almost choked to death stuffing them down."


End file.
